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T O P I C R E V I E WlindisfarneI left my boyfriend because he was abusive. Of course in the beginning he was perfect, until slowly he started to show his true colors. While he did so, I couldn't accept it, I went into panic mode. The thought of me being with an abusive man was too painful for me to admit (Venus and Moon in Pisces house 1) I knew intellectually I needed to leave, but I couldn't. I had tried to get out many times to only be intimidated, coerced and manipulated into staying. It was devastating, the way I idealized him. Every put down, the manipulation, emotional and mental abuse.. Intellectually I knew I had to run far and long but I couldn't leave. I ignored all of this, and wanted so hard to believe he was a good guy and that what was happening wasn't really happening (I tend to escape from things etc) a lot of people were noticing and told me to leave. Instead I became defensive and defended him I thought anyone who was helping was the enemy and not him. Boy was I wrong. I'm not blaming myself because I know at the end of the day he is a very sick person. One who refused me to seek any help of any kind, and one who didn't want me to talk to anyone about the problems we had and if he learned about what I was doing I would face the consequences.I want to know if there are any placements or aspects to be mindful of that indicate potential abuse or tendency to victimize and abuse others? I stayed because I thought the more I tried, the more I showed him how loving I was and caring maybe he would stop and go back to being the guy he was when we met. Wishful thinking. He's not ok that I left. Thankfully I moved and he has absolutely no clue where I cuter Ty reside.CapriquariusWhat are you going on about? You previously said that you leave a relationship immediately once you recognize signs of abuse and now you're saying you shilly-shallied?And I thought I was the sh*ttiest troll in all of LL....thanks for displacing me. >=(FaithHi there, quote:I stayed because I thought the more I tried, the more I showed him how loving I was and caring maybe he would stop and go back to being the guy he was when we met. Wishful thinking. I think your Pisces might be part of the problem. Otherwise you would have just left without caring whether you could help him or not?I'm a Pisces moon- my college boyfriend could be abusive, but I just kept trying to help him out, lift him up, and see things his way. After four years with me I think he WAS improved but then again, so was I, and I moved on.Wishing you the best! mintgirl123I thought in a similar way with an ex that was very manipulative, controllin n abusive. Hey did u hv a tough childhood? Usually stems from that. My parents aren't the most ideal of parents n it did affect me.mintgirl123----ariesdragonI think it's Nessus afflicted? I can't remember 100% though. Abuse is very hard to get over. It can eat u up inside. There's some signs on google about abusive men & women. You need all the knowledge u can get so u can prevent it from happening again. I hope u take care and love yourself very much.FaithAlso, sometimes synastry will bring out the violent side of people.I put lot of stock in Gary Goldschneider's seminal astrology book The Secret Language of Relationships. I remember looking up Chris Brown and Rihanna and being "blown away" because Goldschneider predicted that their combination would make the Taurus (Brown) feel violent, much to his bewilderment. It only makes sense that certain signs or placements can push your buttons. ariesdragon quote:Originally posted by Faith:Hi there, I think your Pisces might be part of the problem. Otherwise you would have just left without caring whether you could help him or not?I'm a Pisces moon- my college boyfriend could be abusive, but I just kept trying to help him out, lift him up, and see things his way. After four years with me I think he WAS improved but then again, so was I, and I moved on.Wishing you the best! He was improved and so were u? You mean he stopped the abuse? Was your dad abusive to you or your mom or anyone in the family? What is your sun sign? FaithHi Ariesdragon,He did become less abusive and critical over time. I could reason with him. I'm a Cap sun, he is a Leo...I've read somewhere that Capricorns typically "serve" Leos. And tame them Ultimately I realized I needed more out of life than a crummy future marrying this person. Graduating college was a big wake-up call for me, I basically re-invented myself at that time.My father wasn't abusive in the slightest, I had a great dad. But I do have Venus conjunct Neptune in Sag, and a T-square involving the moon, Mars, and Venus. I think I was never destined for an easy love life.Cheers, and I hope your story is better.
I'm not blaming myself because I know at the end of the day he is a very sick person. One who refused me to seek any help of any kind, and one who didn't want me to talk to anyone about the problems we had and if he learned about what I was doing I would face the consequences.
I want to know if there are any placements or aspects to be mindful of that indicate potential abuse or tendency to victimize and abuse others? I stayed because I thought the more I tried, the more I showed him how loving I was and caring maybe he would stop and go back to being the guy he was when we met. Wishful thinking. He's not ok that I left. Thankfully I moved and he has absolutely no clue where I cuter Ty reside.
And I thought I was the sh*ttiest troll in all of LL....thanks for displacing me. >=(
quote:I stayed because I thought the more I tried, the more I showed him how loving I was and caring maybe he would stop and go back to being the guy he was when we met. Wishful thinking.
I think your Pisces might be part of the problem. Otherwise you would have just left without caring whether you could help him or not?
I'm a Pisces moon- my college boyfriend could be abusive, but I just kept trying to help him out, lift him up, and see things his way. After four years with me I think he WAS improved but then again, so was I, and I moved on.
Wishing you the best!
I put lot of stock in Gary Goldschneider's seminal astrology book The Secret Language of Relationships. I remember looking up Chris Brown and Rihanna and being "blown away" because Goldschneider predicted that their combination would make the Taurus (Brown) feel violent, much to his bewilderment.
It only makes sense that certain signs or placements can push your buttons.
quote:Originally posted by Faith:Hi there, I think your Pisces might be part of the problem. Otherwise you would have just left without caring whether you could help him or not?I'm a Pisces moon- my college boyfriend could be abusive, but I just kept trying to help him out, lift him up, and see things his way. After four years with me I think he WAS improved but then again, so was I, and I moved on.Wishing you the best!
He was improved and so were u? You mean he stopped the abuse? Was your dad abusive to you or your mom or anyone in the family? What is your sun sign?
He did become less abusive and critical over time. I could reason with him. I'm a Cap sun, he is a Leo...I've read somewhere that Capricorns typically "serve" Leos. And tame them
Ultimately I realized I needed more out of life than a crummy future marrying this person. Graduating college was a big wake-up call for me, I basically re-invented myself at that time.
My father wasn't abusive in the slightest, I had a great dad. But I do have Venus conjunct Neptune in Sag, and a T-square involving the moon, Mars, and Venus.
I think I was never destined for an easy love life.
Cheers, and I hope your story is better.
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